After a long time reading about Romance I got to a conclusion. It’s trying to extend the ephemeral and impermanent.
As Roland Barthes said “Love at first sight is always spoken in the past tense. The scene is perfectly adapted to this temporal phenomenon: distinct, abrupt, framed, it is already a memory […] “for a certain time, though a finite one, a deranged interval, something has been successful: I have been fulfilled: all my desires abolished by the plenitude of their satisfaction.”
In my own words, romance is so ephemeral that while we are going through a romantic relationship or situation we are already sad because of the fact that we might lose that loved one someday. We all now that precious romantic moment will disappear somehow in our future but still we don’t enjoy it. We suffer, as my mom says, “before, during it, and after”.
Quoting Freud’s essay, “On transience” where Rilke says, “I can not get over the fact that one day all of this is going to die”. Romance is a that sad joy that makes us happy and sad at the same time. Like a used bubblegum which we try enjoy until it has no flavor and then try to make it last as long as possible before throwing it away; try to extend the ephemeral and impermanent is love, that’s romance.
“Love is the romantic solution to the problem of death.” – Roland Barthes